Entertainment

Now That We Know Adele's A Spurs Fan, She Wrote "Hello" About Them, Right?

Earlier this week internationally famous singing person Adele threw her support for the Premiership title behind Tottenham Hotspur.

That in and of itself is only sort of newsy, but The18 has learned that Adele's smash hit "Hello" was originally written about Spurs, and we've gotten hold of an exclusive (fake) copy of an early studio take, which we present to you here:

Adele: OK let's get started! Pip pip jiminy crumpets!

Producer who looks like a chimney sweep from Mary Poppins and is covered in soot for no reason: oi, Adele mate, let’s blimey this bugger!

Adele: gibberish in which the only identifiable word is “badger.”

Hello? It’s me

I was wondering if this year you might not be quite so Spursy

Just finish over

Arsene

They say Dier saved the midfield 

and the Belgians helped the "D"

Hellooooo? Can you hear me?

I’m in Northern London dreaming about who we used to be

When we relied on 

Nacer Chadli

I’ve forgotten how it felt 

Before we got Dele Alli

There’s such a difference between now and the Spuuuurrrs ooooffff ooollldddd

HELLO FROM WHITE HART LAAAAANE

PRINCE WILLIAM LOOKS LIKE HARRY KAAAANE

But Kane scores goals 

even when he’s wearing a mask

When he’s in on goal 

He’s usually up to the task

HELLO FROM SECOND PLAAAACE

SPURS MIGHT WIN THE PREMIER LEAGUE RAAAACE

And end St. Totteringham 

once and for all

But it don’t matter 

because their budget ain’t small 

ANYMORE

Hello? How are you?

It’s so typical for Spurs to choke and the fans to be sorry

I hope

That they will

Rid themselves of that blood-pressure-heightening nerve-wracking habit

It’s no secret

If they choke again

I’m gonna lose my shiiiiiiiitttttt

SO HELLO FROM THIS NEW SPURS SIIIIIIDDDEEEE

WE’RE DREADING A LATE-SEASON SLLLIIIIDDEEEE

Because this team has 

A dark history

And if they collapse 

It’s gonna kill me

HELLO FROM THE TOOOOPPPP FOOOUUUUUURRRRRR

WE CANNOT SEEM TO SHUT THE DOOOORRRRR

Even though we’ve scored 

The most goals in the league

It just won’t matter, 

we can’t lose to Arsene 

ANYMOOOORRRREEEE

OOOOhHH OOOOOHHHH ANYMOOOOOREEE OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH ANYMOOOOOREEE OOOOOOHHHHHHH ANYMORRREEEE ANYMOOOOOREEE

HELLO FROM NORTH LONDON’S PRIIIIIDDDDEEE

I MUST SAY IT”S BEEN QUITE A RIIIIIIDDDEEEE

I don’t know how long 

I can watch this team play

When I do they make my 

Hair turn to gray

SOON THEY”LL TAKE THIS EUROPEWIIIIDE

I KNOW WHERE HARRY KANE RESIIIIIDES

But I’m not a 

Stalker or anything

It's just I wonder 

What kind of fee he will bring 

When he’s sold

And that's it. Also: "Skyfall" is actually about Aston Villa.

Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus

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