USMNT

The USA Got CONCACAF'd Out Of The World Cup

This is not a goal. The ball did not go in the goal and therefore it cannot be a goal. The United States are out of the World Cup because this was called a goal. It was not a goal. The ball did not cross the line.

I need a drink. Goodnight.

Jozy Altidore's Panenka Shows A Mean Streak The USA Have Never Had Before

The USMNT has a mean streak now. They're still the team that lost to Costa Rica and drew Honduras last month, and that still needs at least a draw against Trinidad & Tobago to be completely sure of not being knocked out of World Cup qualifying, but when they want to be dickish, this team can be gloriously dickish.

How Will Tuesday Unfold For The USMNT?

Heading into Tuesday’s final matchday in the CONCACAF Hexagonal, there are still a number of scenarios that could confront the United States when the dust eventually settles. Most importantly, the USMNT controls their own destiny. However, things could get a bit dicey in the event of a draw or catastrophic loss. Let’s check it out! 

What happens if…

The United States beats Trinidad & Tobago

PSA: The United States Will Not Play Ghana At The 2018 World Cup

For those looking forward to turning on their television sets in late June to get a glimpse of the comforting quadrennial event that is the United States versus Ghana, you’ll be shocked to discover that the World Cup will no longer feature a clash of the old enemies. Tragically, a rivalry dating back to time immemorial has been scuppered. 

The Field For USA-Trinidad & Tobago Is Currently Underwater

The USMNT are set to try to qualify for the 2018 World Cup against Trinidad & Tobago at a smaller venue than originally planned, and one thing we are happy to report is that everything is going EXTREMELY WELL with the playing surface.

Yes, NOTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY to report. NOTHING AT ALL.

Christian Pulisic Inspires USMNT To Vital 4-0 Rout Of Panama

It’s getting harder and harder to deny the hype of Christian Pulisic; it’s getting harder and harder to find new superlatives for the teenager. Pulisic, who recently turned 19, was brilliant for 55 minutes but that was all he needed to inspire the United States to a crucial 4-0 rout of Panama in World Cup qualifying on Friday in Orlando. 

Everything You Need To Know Heading Into This Weekend’s Intense Final Round Of World Cup Qualifiers

Perhaps more than any other weekend every four years, this upcoming (extended) weekend from Thursday to Tuesday defines a nation’s success on the world football stage. Playoffs aside, this is the final week of World Cup qualifiers, and it’s going to be absolutely bonkers.

There is so much at stake for so many countries from traditional powers (Argentina, Netherlands) to the incredible underdogs (Syria, Iceland) and everyone in between. Only a handful of teams have already qualified and an incredible amount are still in the running. 

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