Where the hell is Zlatan Ibrahimovic playing next season? What the hell do all these Zlatan transfer rumors mean?
One thing is for certain, he is leaving PSG. The Parisian municipal government won’t pony up the dough for a larger than life size statue of Zlatan, you know the one that’s gonna replace the Eiffel Tower. So just where is he set to go?
The Super Cup, the League Cup and the League. This is how it should look after a good season!http://t.co/iaOt5npg51 pic.twitter.com/C82AzZWRWk
— Zlatan Ibrahimović (@Ibra_official) May 18, 2014
Zlatan Transfer Rumors: To The MLS
L.A Galaxy: Zlatan is a star so it’s only natural for him to join his fellow stars. I mean for all intents and purposes Zlatan’s massive charisma would fit right into the metropolitan city full of sunshine and art. One could easily imagine Zlatan lording over the Red Carpets with a-listers Leo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt. But don’t forget guys, Zlatan is the prettiest and the best of your bunch. I mean c’mon: he’s Zlatan.
New York City FC: Or maybe he needs a grittier and livelier city like New York. He could join Patrick Vieira’s New York City FC. But, fair warning New York, if you win the MLS Cup you’re replacing Lady Liberty with a marble icon of your new Nordic God. All hail Zlatan.
Or maybe Zlatan is off to the EPL.
Zlatan Transfer Rumors: To The EPL
Manchester City: Hell no. No chance. It is now a highly publicized fact that Zlatan Ibrahimovic and incoming Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola don’t fancy each other. These two men cannot stand the sight of each other for long periods of time. Zlatan has even gone so far as to say about Guardiola that: "As a person, I have no comments about that. That is something else. He is not a man. There’s nothing more to say." Zlatan, the ultimate man, doesn’t think Pep Guardiola is a man. This would hardly make for a reunion with open arms. Hell, they can probably barely look at each other in the eye.
Manchester United: Zlatan and rumored incoming manager Jose Mourinho have an excellent relationship. The complete opposite of his with Pep. One can only imagine a galloping Zlatan bolting a ball past Joe Hart’s goalposts in next season’s Manchester Derby, and Jose Mourinho suddenly sliding across the Etihad turf in ecstasy.
Arsenal: Zlatan and only Zlatan could win Arsenal the league. The ultimate sad sack club of English football needs to smile again, and the gargantuan Swede could be the man to finally end the Gunners’ Premier League drought. Although he may be too cocky to return to a club who had the audacity to ask him to trial; the London club clearly had no idea who they were dealing with and definitely no idea how good he’d become. Arsene Wenger must be kicking himself: what else is new?
Chelsea: Owner Roman Abramovich’s ego could rival Zlatan’s own, and the Russian billionaire could certainly afford him. However, Chelsea’s lack of Champions League football next season is definitely a dissuading factor for the striker to consider.
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So, just where or when will Zlatan go? This European season isn’t even over yet, but the next one can’t start soon enough. Zlatan is changing clubs and one thing is for certain, he will do as he always does, score goals, win games and win trophies.
