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News

Bye Sepp: Highlights From The Dumbest Press Conference Of All Time

Sepp Blatter and Michel Platini were both given eight-year bans from all soccer activity today by the FIFA Ethics Committee. After the bans were announced, Sepp Blatter put on a little press conference in which he said some outlandish things and then said some even more outlandish things. What follows is a "greatest hits" of Blatter's press-conference quotes (via AP reporter Rob Harris). They were a delight.

Sepp came out swinging. 

And then he swung even more, by saying that people were swinging at him unfairly.

Given that Sepp is not a native English speaker, we will forgive his use of "punching ball" instead of "punching bag" here. But, if there were ever a punching ball that really needed to be punched, that punching ball would be Sepp Blatter.

Somewhere John Grisham is furiously tyoing the first chapter of his explosive new legal thriller, "Collateral Danger."

He's not fighting for him. He's fighting for his rights to be restored. Totally different.

Yeah good luck with that.

Nah.

It already is the end, Sepp.

By "good" we assume he means "still beating."

Here's a wrap-up of the whole thing.

See you in (at minimum) eight years, Sepp.

Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus

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