Did Dani Alves Wipe His Nose On Ronaldo?

Footballers aren't like regular humans. They live different lives, and operate in completely different planes of existence. To wit: in my capacity as a professional soccer jokester, I have never had to take to social media to deny wiping a booger on the shirt of a professional colleague. Not even at the company Christmas party.

Dani Alves, however . . .

Penoso en mi profesion en la mayoría de las veces no es quedar eliminado, eso forma parte del cotidiano nuestro, pero tener que ver y escuchar bobadas como esa.... pero bueno, continuaré competiendo como hice hasta hoy y las bobadas para los bobos!! #respectwinorlose!! https://t.co/XdHQyesSXm

— Daniel Alves (@DaniAlvesD2) March 8, 2018

Here is the offending incident:

Dani Alves did this to #CR7 and got away with it... pic.twitter.com/t9aL6xQY4w

— Rivalo (@RivaloSports) March 8, 2018

That looks like a bit of a stretch to me, even though it is way more fun to believe Dani Alves wiped a booger on Cristiano Ronaldo's shirt on purpose during the Champions League knockout stage.

In any case, PSG were the ones being wiped on Wednesday. You might say they blew their chance.