Images of what has been reported as th enew Premier League ball have been released, and we, personally, aren't fans. But, looking at the ball, that might be because we aren't currently on acid. Because we aren't currently aren't on acid, and as such aren't fans of the new ball, we wrote a roast to let the new ball know how we feel about it.
The Roast Of The New Premier League Ball
This thing looks like something you would eat in Ibiza and then not remember the next three days.
It looks like someone filled a snow-globe with vomit then shook it up.
I thought they were supposed to be presenting a new Premier League ball, not a new flavor of Skittles.
That ball looks like it was tye-dyed by a drunk 10-year-old.
If that ball was a shirt, footballers wouldn't even wear it because it's too gaudy even for them.
Seriously, why did they outsource the design to Willie Wonka? Salvador Dali was unavailable?
If Dr. Seuss wrote a book about soccer, his made-up creatures would use that ball.
It looks like they let a class full of kindergarteners fingerpaint it.
Ball lookin' like something you would find in a warehouse with electronic music blaring surrounded by happy people with pacifiers drinking lots of water.
The concept for this ball was actually made up at Woodstock.
Trivia answer: the ball is actually made out of Gumby.
We've obtained exclusive footage of the ball's design and creation process:
Also this:
At least everyone will be able to see it if the power goes out during a game.
Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus
