Chivas Goalscorer Was Obviously Inspired By The Majestic Harvest Full Moon

A goal so good you gotta pull your butt out.

Whatever you do, don’t show this to Joe Buck. Yesterday, Guadalajara registered a 1-0 victory over Atlas at Estadio Akron thanks to a 63rd-minute crack from Alexis Vega, who then exposed his crack. The 21-year-old Mexican boofed one from over 25 yards out to keep Chivas in the thick of the liguilla race, and then he fought off a strong desire to strip nude before settling for half-naked.

It’s an incredible strike that leaves Atlas goalkeeper Camilo Vargas reaching for the stars, but Vega is the moon. He’s the recent Friday the 13th harvest moon, resplendent in the autumnal air and breathing in the humid subtropics with his bare buttocks.  

After putting his ass away, Vega went tarps off. If you’re wondering why he’s wearing that sports bra sort of thing, boy, do I have an SEO article for you.

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