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We have some very exciting news on a hot prospect out of the United States who runs like the wind, has quick feet and shifty movement. That's because the hot prospect is a deer. A soccer deer.
No, this isn't a movie about a cute fury animal that thinks it's people excelling at a people sport, like Air Bud. Air Bud is fiction. This is real.
Apparently an errant deer ran onto the field during a youth soccer game, disrupting play. This is a fairly normal occurrence in places in the United States where you can find deer, which is to say nearly everywhere. What was not normal about this deer's adorable Disney-movie pitch invasion is the deer scored.
The deer has obviously put the world of pun-loving sports writers in a tizzy, with FOX Sports dubbing it "Bambinho" (clearly incorrect, as the deer couldn't be Bambi because it appears to be a doe, a deer, a female deer), and SB Nation going with "Cristiano Doenaldo" (better). We like to think we're better that stupid puns here at The18, so we'll refrain and simply congratulate the deer on a poacher's finish.
You didn't think we meant it when we said we were better than puns, right? No one is better than puns, and there are more to come.
She made the goalkeeper pay...dearly.
Whether or not you, the reader, are behooved to watch this video, you can certainly agree that a deer scoring a goal is quite impressive, considering deer don't even have toes. Rumor has it Jill Ellis has aready been in contact with the deer's agent about declaring for the U.S. national team. The soccer deer could be a big asset given its pace and finishing ability. However, the agent apparently said the deer wants to just continue with her home-forest club team and not go near people because they're scary and have guns and cars.
Another speedy, promising winger that couldn't handle the footballer's lifestyle. What a shame. Such is life. Good luck, soccer deer.
(H/T FOX Soccer)
Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus
