So far this season, Liverpool FC have dominated Manchester City at Manchester City, done the same thing to Chelsea, been the first team to hold Leicester City scoreless, gone to penalties with a fourth division team, lost twice to West Ham, beat Southampton 6-1 and lost to Newcastle at home.

In short, Liverpool's season makes no sense. At least, that's what we thought. And then we found this video of Martin Skrtel wearing a mechanical turkey hat. And everything made sense.

Former Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson has admitted to losing sleep and phoning Tonya Harding for advice over Liverpool’s appointment of Jurgen Klopp as manager. Well...maybe not. If Ferguson has been watching recent United matches, he’s not having any trouble sleeping. He might have Tonya's mobile number, though.

*Warning to readers with even a shred of dignity: do not read any further if you are offended by any and/or all references to Steven Gerrard's penis. Thank you.

Chapter six of Steven Gerrard's new book, "My Story," starts like this:

"The magic of the FA Cup was ruined the day my penis was bloodied and then stitched shut on an unromantic night in Bournemouth."

I like to imagine somewhere in Merseyside this week, Brendan Rodgers and Jurgen Klopp met at Liverpool Lime Street, at the train station, and had a cup of coffee. In my head the conversation was light and mostly not about soccer. Something like this:

Klopp laughs a shushed laugh at one of Rodgers’s stories about Jose Mourinho from his time at Chelsea, and then there’s a natural pause in the smooth, flowing conversation. This is uncomfortable for both men.

Rodgers: “This is a really good club, you know.”

It was a rocky three-year-long marriage, but Liverpool finally parted ways with Brendan Rodgers. Now, the Reds are keen on hiring a high profile manager to lead the club (most notably former Borussia Dortmund man Jurgen Klopp), and the immediate start of the search has seen Liverpool contact Klopp and Carlo Ancelotti. 

Former Liverpool favorite John Aldridge would like to see the Italian manager commanding the club.

Liverpool FC have announced they have fired Brendan Rodgers. The sacking is effective immediately following the club's lackluster 1-1 draw with Everton. The "Rodgers Out" cries sounded far and wide on Twitter.

In England, it doesn’t get any bigger than Manchester United and Liverpool. Just ask Pele, who compared the Northwest England derby to El Clasico last spring. Thirty-four miles and two major trophies separate the two most successful sides In England history.

Suarez has pulled off one of the hardest things a great player can ever do: leave a great, proud club for an even better one, and still have the old fan base like him. 

Sure, there was some bad blood in the immediate aftermath of his departure from Liverpool, but now, a year on, it’s hard to say that many Liverpool fans dislike the man. Whenever he comes up in conversation, thoughts usually turn to all of the ridiculously amazing things he did for the club, not bitterness. 

Serious question: do you think you could do a dizzy penalty?

Gareth Bale couldn't do it.

Apparently this is a thing now. Players spin around and try and take a penalty and it's hilarious. We don't know why they would do this, but whatever. Minor details.

Look! Liverpool players tried it too! We learned that Joe Gomez is likely a better dizzy defender than a dizzy attacker, among other things.

Aston Villa will host Manchester United this weekend in their first home opener match at Villa Park and will look for a second win despite many pivotal players leaving the club. At least Christian Benteke will start for Villa as a striker, right? As far as Neil Warnock is concerned, Tim Sherwood will play Benteke up front with Fabian Delph right behind him in central midfield.