Manchester United don't need Jose Mourinho, judging by their performances over the past week.

You can't help but laugh at the constant back and forth of soccer fans. Just two weeks ago, Manchester United fans were calling for Louis Van Gaal's head. Jose Mourinho scarves were being sold outside Old Trafford, and there was talk that the Dutchman was done after pitiful losses to FC Midtjylland and Sunderland. 

Hello darkness my old friend.

As an Arsenal fan, waking up at 4:00 a.m. on a Sunday for a sunrise hike with my roommate, only to run out of gas halfway to the trailhead, was a lot like getting home after said hike knowing that I had today’s Arsenal vs Manchester United game recorded, only to accidentally check my notifications and see two Marcus Rashford goals against Arsenal.

Memphis Depay is a murderer. In Manchester United's game against FC Midtjylland, The Dutch international repeatedly destroyed poor right back Andre Romer, who was left almost in tears after the display. The Red Devils crushed the Danish club 5-1, and at times it seemed more like Memphis Depay vs Midtjylland as the Dutchman ran rampant. 

John Terry: captain, leader, legend and collector of an insane amount of glorious soccer memorabilia. The 18-year professional has collected nearly every medal on the planet and his stunning trophy case represents that fact. Four Premier League titles, five FA Cups, and UEFA Europa League and Champions League winner’s medals represent the greatest achievements for the Chelsea captain.

Manchester City took on Dynamo Kiev and won 3 - 1. Sergio Aguero opened the scoring early in the 15th minute. David Silva added the second in the 40th and Yaya Toure scored a third in the 90th minute. For Kiev, Vitaliy Buyalsky scored in the 58th minute. In the Netherlands, PSV Eindhoven and Atletico Madrid played to a 0 - 0 draw. 

Leg 2 for these four teams is on March 15th as PSV fly to Madrid and Kiev visit Manchester. 

Manchester City vs. Dynamo Kiev

Louis van Gaal wants his players to be horny for the Europa League. Seriously. Here's the man himself.

Listen to Louis van Gaal say "horny" (via @SportDictator)pic.twitter.com/rkOFx54TXh

— HuffPost Sports (@HuffPostSports) February 24, 2016

Brendan Rodgers proposed to his girlfriend in Times Square. She said yes. This is undeniably happy news for the former Liverpool boss, but it closes the book on one of the greatest Premier League romances of all time: Brendan Rodgers and Joe Allen.

Congratulations to Brendan Rodgers who proposed today in public pic.twitter.com/gFwXTRQt67

— Indigo (@IndigoLFC) February 23, 2016

FC Barcelona traveled to England and beat Arsenal 2 - 0. Messi scored both goals, the first in the 71st minute and the second on a penalty in the 83rd. While in Turino, Italy, Bayern took a two goal lead from Thomas Mueller and Arjen Robben. Mueller scored the first goal in the 43rd minute and Robben added the 2nd in the 55th. Juventus battled back for the 2 - 2 tie with goals in the 63rd and 76th minute. The first was scored by Paulo Dybala and the tying goal came from Stefano Sturaro. 

Everybody, listen up! We have Manchester United boardroom power struggle gossip to pass along!

In a series of Tweets, Manchester United fan organization Red Issue (which we have no idea as to its credibility) laid out what they believe is going down behind the scenes at Old Trafford. 

If this stuff is true, hoo boy. If not, it's still an entertaining fantasy.

Manchester United Conspiracy

RI's MUFC boardroom's political skulduggery guide coming up soon...

Liverpool defender Mamadou Sakho is one of the happiest dudes in the Premier League. We offer as evidence this video of Sakho zooming around Paris on a motorbike talking to himself in French. He spies former PSG and current France international teammate Blaise Matuidi standing by a car and just has to pull over and say hello.

Mamadou Sakho casually bumps into a surprised Blaise Matuidi in the streets of Paris on his motorbike. pic.twitter.com/0k2uD176mi