Watch This Army Of Back-Flipping ‘Mini Cheetah’ Robots Playing Soccer And Never Sleep Again

Soccer in America is failing, they say. The USMNT sucks! The USWNT will soon be passed by Europeans!

Soccer, we’ve been told, will never fully succeed in America.

Well now, Americans have found a way to stay relevant in soccer — at least once our robot overlords take over. 

In a series of videos that is sure haunt your nightmares, some “Mini Cheetah” robots from MIT have been shown to frolic, run, gallop, trot, prance, do backflips and, yes, play soccer.

After Vlatko Andonovski used dogs in training the USWNT, we think Gregg Berhalter should take some pointers from these robots.

Here the cheetahs are seen warming up with various stretches and running gaits. Berhalter’s team faded in a 2-0 loss to Canada last month, so maybe some of these drills would serve folks like Michael Bradley well. 

Here's MIT's Mini Cheetah demonstrating a variety of walking and running gaits. Via the Biomimetic Robotics Lab @MITMechE. #robots #robotics pic.twitter.com/YaRunrdcCi

— Robot&AIWorld (@RobotAndAIWorld) October 8, 2019

Look at how well that Mini Cheetah stays on its feet despite being fouled. We can think of a few footballers who would benefit from such agility.

We’re pretty sure Michael Bradley cannot do a backflip, but maybe he should learn a thing or two from these robots. Hiding in the leaves and ambushing opponents with a backflip, as these Mini Cheetahs do, seems like a solid strategy for when Canada visits Orlando next week.

Here's more footage of MIT's Mini Cheetahs cavorting, frolicking, back-flipping, playing soccer and generally acting fun and cute, courtesy of the Biomimetic Robotics Lab @MITMechE #robots #robotics pic.twitter.com/8ZQzDvCDVW

— Robot&AIWorld (@RobotAndAIWorld) November 7, 2019

Finally it’s time to get to some real soccer action, and here’s where the robots really outpace the American men: passing.

Sure, Christian Pulisic can dribble past the best of them and score Premier League hat tricks, but can he pass like this stalking robot?

Just a bunch of Mini Cheetahs doing synchronized backflips and playing soccer. @MITMechE Biomimetic Robotics Lab, via @welcomeai #robots #robotics pic.twitter.com/skaR8rXhOI

— Robot&AIWorld (@RobotAndAIWorld) November 5, 2019

Alas, robots are not currently allowed to play under FIFA rules. We long for the day robots are allowed to play alongside humans in a true, egalitarian society. 

Or, if nothing else, could we get some damn robots to umpire the World Series?