The New PlayStation F.C. Dualshock 4 Controller Will Improve Your Sex Life
Get the best email in soccer.
Finally, I can score in style — and I don’t even need Tinder and a Kohl's gift card from Mom.
Sony announced a fabulous new limited edition controller for the PS4 named the “Limited Edition PlayStation F.C. Dualshock 4” and I’m totally stoked. I’m going to be banging in goals on FIFA like Arthur Friedenrich, scoring more than Trump in the 90s.
How could I possible fail to pound in at least 17 goals per game with a controller that looks like this?
— PlayStation Europe (@PlayStationEU) August 10, 2017
Look at the sweet crest on the right side. How did they know my favorite club was PlayStation F.C.? I play as them on FIFA all the time. And that 18-yard box on the touch pad is totes adorbs.
The best part is they managed to pull master tactician Sir Alex Ferguson out of retirement to draw up one more play, seen on the left side. I can’t wait to try it out when FIFA 18 drops on September 29th, the same day the controller will become available.
Except, it appears the magic goal-scoring wand will only be available in Europe, not including the U.K. Ah well, I guess I’ll go buy a new shirt instead.