Not every gift needs to be good. Not every gift needs to be well-received by its owner. Not every gift needs to make the receiver feel joy and good cheer. Some gifts must enrage the person who gets them, in turn causing the giver to laugh themselves silly. Some gifts must necessarily be bad, because are you really friends with someone if you don't spend every waking second trying to annoy them?
Reader, the answer is no. In that spirit, we have compiled a list of the 18 funniest and worst gifts you can get for a soccer fan. We promise they will not disappoint. Or, rather, we promise that they will definitely disappoint.
The 18 Funniest Soccer Gifts
2. Soccer Poop Emoji Notebook (For Ladies)
6. Model Bus
11. Some Carabao
12. Chevy Cruze
13. "My Goal Is To Deny Yours" Shirt
17. Bastian Schweinsteiger Nazi Doll (Just Kidding Don't Buy This)
What kind of sick, twisted, depraved mind came up with this concept? And what sick, twisted, depraved minds went along with it? This is not a soccer poop emoji journal. This is a cry for help.
Y'ALL THEY MADE A LADY VERSION. THE POOP IS PINK NOW! I am pretty sure that is not anatomically correct, but we are far past the point of picking nits here.
Hey, uh, it's too bad you can't, uh, erase Swansea's terrible record huh?
Your friends would probably not be STOKED to find this in their stockings!!!!!
These shirts are funny because you should never pass to anyone. Keep all the glory for yourself.
Buy this for a Manchester United fan and watch them rage.
Imagine getting a Real Madrid jersey for Christmas and being excited and then turning it around and it's Lucas Vazquez.
You can buy a Mickey Mouse hat on Bayern Munich's website for some reason. On sale! Fifty percent off!
This mask will haunt your dreams, and the dreams of whoever you give it to. It will also run a lot. A LOT. Liverpool's website says the mask is "Ideal for parties." It is not that.
We have been over this already but please buy Cristiano Ronaldo's denim products. Cristiano Ronaldo: the most trusted name in denim.
Celebrate the current sponsor of the English League Cup by, uh, buying some. What is Carabao, exactly? We're not sure, but we can't be bothered to look it up because truly we have no interest in finding out.
Chevy is the jersey sponsor for Manchester United, and the Chevy Cruze is one of the most boring, unremarkable cars ever made. Bit like a Jose Mourinho side against another big team, really.
The copywriter who thought this line up was probably very proud of his or her self, but the same effect could have been achieved with the line "I am a tremendous goober" or "I am a goalkeeper but there is literally nothing else interesting about me." MY goal is to deny this t-shirt.
Liverpool fans will love this. Trust us. If the mug slips it won't break, though.
Why does this videogame exist and why is it for sale on Amazon.com? Who even has an original XBox anymore?
Neymar does not play for Barcelona anymore, but you can still buy a Barcelona Neymar poster. They're pretty cheap, for anyone who knows someone who pines for the good old MSN days.
We are not making this doll up. Do not buy it under any circumstances, even if you can find it. Nazis are bad.
Surely this grinning imp will help you sleep more soundly at night.
Now go out there and make someone you care about extremely angry!
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