I can't get this commercial out of my head. It's been around for a few years, but I hadn't seen it until last night and, well . . .
(shudders)
I will have a tough time getting over this one. THE THINGS THESE EYES HAVE SEEN.
(shudders again)
Why does Cristiano Ronaldo have a pulsating spider on his tummy?
(shudders so hard I go into convulsions)
You know a dirty game when you see one. Players go flying into tackles, things get chippy and the referee absolutely loses control of the match. Two or three red cards in a match is enough to make people cringe, but how about 36?
No, that’s not a typo — 36 red cards. In one game.
Arsenal fans singing songs to persuade Alexis Sanchez to stay, I'm done pic.twitter.com/4YqvYA6pI2
— José (@MourinhoMindset) August 30, 2017
Patrik Schick. He’s a Czech forward. He signed with AS Roma on Tuesday. But look, no one cares about the player. Let’s talk about that announcement video.
Confirmation bias — the human tendency to solely interact with information that confirms one’s preexisting beliefs while simultaneously firebombing any real sort of learning or personal growth — has long been a massive hinderance to humanity.
Some referees will let you get away with murder. Others will send you off for bad breath. Getting a grasp on what a ref will and will not allow is vital in every match for those who like to push the line, but getting a grasp on what the following refs were thinking is beyond our abilities.
We’ve compiled a list of the players who've been least deserving of being sent off, juxtaposed against players who were most deserving of seeing red but were allowed to stay on the pitch.
FK Sloboda is a football club and not in the construction business. This was apparent Sunday when building a wall to defend a free kick against HŠK Zrinjski in the Premier League of Bosnia & Herzegovina.
Thanks to state-of-the-art microphone technology, we were able to pick up on the conversation that went on as Sloboda planned out its strategy.
“Everybody listen up. I have the best plan, the greatest plan, a better plan than any of the tacticians in Italy or England could think up.”
“OK skipper, what have you got in mind for defending this free kick?”
Hey, so this is going well, don’t you think? To be honest, it's really going too well. Our Pulisic-O-Meter wasn't designed well enough to withstand this breakneck pace of USMNT wins in the Bundesliga.
After scoring against Bayern Munich in the German Super Cup to jump-start his 2017-18 season, Christian Pulisic opened his league campaign with a goal and an assist against Wolfsburg on Saturday.
As if things aren't bad enough for Arsenal these days, now Manchester United is breathing down its neck as the most musically challenged squad in the English Premier League.
For those familiar with the wizarding sport of Quidditch, you’ll know that teams inconsequentially spend long periods of time throwing the Quaffle through goal hoops for the pittance of 10 points. This is all entirely meaningless because during this time, the seeker is attempting to catch the Golden Snitch, ending the game and giving his side 150 points.