Things got heated during Manchester United vs Newcastle United this last week. Johnny Evans and Papiss Cisse got into it a little, as all rival defenders and forwards do. There was some pushing, some shoving, and all of the sudden Papiss Cisse was on the floor. Again, nothing too strange. As Cisse got up, however, things took the aforementioned turn for the…um…unexpected.
Yes, that’s Johnny Evans spitting in the general direction of Papiss Cisse. It doesn’t seem like the spittle hit him, but that didn’t stop Cisse from getting up in Evans’ grill and spitting back, nailing Evans right on the neck.
We know, the angle we provide doesn’t show this, but this picture does.
Photo: guardian_sport | Twitter
Now that’s thinking outside the box, Cisse. Forwards are always told to have a killer instinct, to “go for the jugular.” Cisse has a psychological advantage now. The same applies for Evans. Who would want to mess around with someone that spits on people? It’s revolting.
The real hilarity in this whole situation, though, comes not from the act itself, but from Louis van Gaal, who apparently “cannot imagine” Evans would do such a thing. Here’s the full quote:
"I didn't see [the incident] from the bench. It's too far to see spitting, so I cannot judge that. But I cannot imagine that Jonny Evans, because he is a very modest person, that he could do that. I cannot imagine."
For a manager that has been accused of being lost, out of ideas, and generally underwhelming during his time at United, this is just all too rich. His tactics have become less and less creative as the season progresses, and now he cannot imagine arguably the most creative event to happen during a United match all season. Yes, we did just call spitting at a player creative. Deal with it.
