A quick word about the actual Champions League draw: it's a big dumb ceremony that needs some fixing, but will never be fixed because UEFA will never, ever admit that something is bad enough to need fixing. Anyway, the groups have been announced, and there's some fun stuff in here.
Group A: PSG, Arsenal, Basel, Ludogorets Razgrad
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
PSG vs. Arsenal is obviously the marquee matchup in Group A. We bet Edinson Cavani and Olivier Giroud will combine to miss 5,362 seemingly-easy chances.
Group B: Benfica, Napoli, Dynamo Kiev, Besiktas
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
This is one of those groups in which every team feels like they should advance, which is to say none of these teams are all that good.
Group C: Barcelona, Manchester City, Borussia Monchengladbach, Celtic
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
Pep is coming back to Barcelona, Marc Andre Ter Stegen is coming back to Monchengladbach and Kolo Toure is going to play at the Camp Nou. Magic.
Group D: Bayern Munich, Atletico Madrid, PSV, FC Rostov
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
Bayern Munich and Atletico Madrid players are already talking s*** to each other on Twitter.
Group E: CSKA Moscow, Bayer Leverkusen, Tottenham Hotspur, Monaco
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
See "Group B".
Group F: Real Madrid, Borussia Dortmund, Sporting CP, Legia Warsaw
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
Real Madrid vs. Dortmund is going to be so much fun.
Group G: Leicester City, Porto, Club Brugge, FC Copenhagen
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
Leicester City got a great draw, and should probably advance along with Porto.
Group H: Juventus, Sevilla, Lyon, Dinamo Zagreb
— The18 (@the18soccer) August 25, 2016
*Cut to Sevilla top brass plotting ways to finish third and drop down into the Europe League so they can win it again*
Matches start on September 13, so you guys have until then to either blow your teams' chances wildly out of proportion or fabricate ways in which they'll not live up to expectations. Or, in the case of Arsenal fans, think of all the different possible ways they'll finish second in their group then lose in the round of 16.
Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus
