Portugal's Mannequin Challenge Proves You Know Nothing

I don't know anything. This was clearly demonstrated to me today when a friend told me to check out Portugal's mannequin challenge. First off, I had no idea how to spell mannequin, and I thought I was on top of my spelling. This isn't an auspicious beginning.

Second, what the hell is the mannequin challenge? I guess the video will explain that. I hope it's funny.

Oh, okay! What the f***, this is what we're doing now? Recreating Madame Tussauds because we're so bored with this planet? We've seen better centuries, no doubt. While we're most in love with spectacles of disintegration, at least we now have this unshakable image of what it's like in Portugal's locker room: a lot of dudes going about their business while a nearly naked Cristiano Ronaldo wildly flexes and screams.

WTF is going on. 

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