Outrageous
Footage Of Robinho’s Real Madrid Debut Belongs In An Art Gallery
Robinho made a name for himself in Brazil when he rose through the youth ranks at Santos to sign his first professional contract with the club as an 18-year-old. That very same year (2002), before the launch of YouTube or anything else that allowed videos to be shared virally on a global level, there was hearsay of the next Pele having drawn a penalty in the Brazilian championship final with a ‘pedalada’ so mesmerizing that it beggared description.
BREAKING: Cristiano Ronaldo Airport Bust Speaking, Questioning Validity Of Own Existence
The bust of Cristiano Ronaldo at the Cristiano Ronaldo International Airport in Madeira has miraculously gained consciousness, it’s first words being “I think you all should know that I’m feeling very depressed.”
“Do I have a mark on my face?” he then asked. “It really hurts. I can’t feel my body, so that doesn’t hurt very much, but my face does. Right here,” he said while scrunching the left side of his face. “Not here or here so much. Right here.”
The Charlotte Independence Do Not Know When April Fools Day Is
One of the most annoying trends (which we will be participating in, by the way) on the internet is publishers publishing obviously false stories on April Fools Day. This year, April Fools Day is on a Saturday, so many publishers are doing something even more annoying, publishing their "fools" on March 31 instead. Enter the Charlotte Independence, who published a thing about signing former NFL wide receiver Randy Moss.
Could The Chicago Fire Win The World Cup?
Remember when Bastian Schweinsteiger was introduced to the Chicago Fire? And that guy asked him if the club had a real shot at a World Cup with his joining of the squad?
The Game Goes On, Not Matter The Conditions In Iceland
You've Been Pronouncing MLS Team Names Wrong Since Day One
We here in soccer media are very stupid. Much of the time, we don't even know how to properly stylize the names of the teams we're writing about!
Luckily, the MLS has come out with a handy style guide for urchin media members such as ourselves who keep writing MLS team names in non-MLS-approved stylizations. This is a thing that the world definitely needed, and you can read the whole thing here.
Watch This Giraffe Kick Around a Soccer Ball
The Unbelievable Story Of The Chicago Sting Drafting The Playmate Of The Year
As we approach the beginning of the 22nd season of MLS and fifth of NWSL, now’s as good a time as any to reflect on how far soccer has come in North America. Another gorgeous soccer-specific stadium in being opened in Orlando with additional stadia planned for Washington, D.C.
Luis Suarez's Volley Against Sporting Gijon Was Like This Truck Hitting Spike Strips At 115 Miles Per Hour
I want to talk about trucks for a second. Not just any trucks, mind you, but trucks being driven 115 miles per hour by escaped convicts that hit spike strips and fly through the air and land on Toyota Corollas.
This is what I want to talk about: