Today Would Be Zlatan's Birthday If Zlatan Aged Like A Normal Human

It is Zlatan Ibrahimovic's birthday today. Today, October 3, 2017, Zlatan turns 36 in people years. I say in people years because we all know Zlatan is actually ageless. A descendant of the stars.

You don't have to get Zlatan anything. Zlatan already has everything he could possibly need (except for a functioning knee but he's working on that). Instead, celebrate Zlatan's birthday with 13 minutes of beautiful Zlatan goals.

Surgeon: Zlatan Ibrahimovic Has The Knees Of A 15-Year-Old

Zlatan Ibrahimovic tore his ACL in April and is still recovering. It’s unlikely he’ll return in 2017, though Manchester United included him on its Champions League group stage roster. More than likely he’ll be back in 2018 and he’ll probably score a few golazos along the way.

Importantly for the Manchester United striker in his recovery is his strength and overall health. According to Dr. Freddie Fu Ho-keung, the surgeon who performed Ibrahimovic’s knee surgery, the 35-year-old has the knees of a 15-year-old boy.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s Zany Video Game Lives Up To His Name

All footballers aspire to see their likeness in the FIFA videogame. The best aspire to be on the cover of FIFA. The Zlatan aspires to make his own damn game. 

Zlatan Legends, developed by Isbit Games, was released Thursday on the Apple App Store worldwide to critical acclaim — well, acclaim. Created in the likeness of legendary Swede Zlatan Ibrahimovic, the game has you kick a ball around a course as fast as you can. 

Essentially it’s a soccer/racing game/endless runner hybrid with an intergalactic space milieu. If that’s not Zlatan, I don’t know what is.