Zlatan Ibrahimovic is mostlyknown for two things: thinking very highly of himself, and doing things on a soccer field that cause other people to think very highly of him.
The first trait was on display when Zlatan met Juan Carlos I, the 79-year-old former King of Spain.
Dirk Kuyt's five-year-old son is about as good as you would expect the progeny of a very good attacker formerly of Liverpool and the Dutch National Team to be.
Which is to say Dirk Kuyt's kid is very good.
The LA Galaxy challenged the Portland Timbers, and our MLS Rankings of Power, by posting a disparaging meme aimed at Diego Chara and David Guzman after the two combined to get Jelle Van Damme sent off on Sunday.
Van Damme was booked for both tackles although he made contact with neither player. Guzman actually spectacularly injured himself with his dive, which is another joke in and of itself.
Chicharito lost a Super Bowl bet. We've all been there. We've all had to do some silly stunt or say something outlandish in a public place or, in the case of the Bayer Leverkusen striker, shave our head.
Alberto Moreno got some new tattoos. The man is running out of places on his body to put them, but he found a way. They are very nice tattoos. One is of a tiger wearing a bandana. One is of a panda wearing a monocle. One is of a dog wearing bocing gloves. They are all winners.
Wednesday’s historic match between Barcelona and PSG has already entered footballing lore alongside Germany’s 7-1 destruction of Brazil and Portugal’s improbable victory over France. These are matches that, in today’s day and age, will always provide us with a good laugh and meme. PSG’s capitulation is now part of the comical DNA of the game.
Sweden’s national women’s team will no longer display their names on the back of their football shirts, but don’t worry the new jerseys will not disappoint.
Ah, Germany, the land of order and organization, logic and reason. You know, or not.
We bring to you this alarming tweet from Bundesliga club Hamburger SV:
Mix Diskerud may not be long for the city that never sleeps, if a poem he posted on Instagram is any indication.
At least if the whole soccer thing doesn't work out, which from the looks of the poem it might not, he'll have a future in brooding and smoking some kind of obscure, disgusting tobacco.