Caleb Porter Reportedly Out As Timbers Coach, USMNT Rumors Swirl

In a league where parity reigns unlike any other, the tenure of Caleb Porter as manager of the Portland Timbers will go down as one of the most wildly successful in Major League Soccer’s 22-year existence. According to reports, that tenure has reached a shocking conclusion — by mutual consent — after a season in which the Timbers finished at the top of the Western Conference.

15 Great Goals From Footballers That Generation Z Only Knows As Managers

Generation Z . . . psh. Am I right my Baby Boomers? Baby Boomers . . . cripes. You feel me my Gen Z-ers? But not so fast — I’m here to bridge the incommunicable divide between those that’ve had the same job out in the ‘burbs for 50 years now and those that’ve hopped between three jobs over the past week in Gentrified City. 

Football will be our olive branch, and footballers turned managers will be our common ground. For boomers, sit back and enjoy the nostalgia. For Generation Z, look at Antonio Conte without any hair! 

Ipswich Town's Manager Went On The Silliest Rant Of The Year

Normally, when one's 21-year-old Kosovar striker makes a substitute appearance after fans have been calling for him and ends up scoring the winner, that is cause for celebration. Not for Ipswich Town manager Mick McCarthy, though. Mick McCarthy does not celebrate.

Ipswich Town were down 1-0 to Burton Albion on Saturday in the second half, and fans were calling for Bersant Celina, a 21-year-old Kosovar on loan from Manchester City, to be introduced. Ipswich Town tied the match up in the 66th minute and Celino came on in the 84th, scoring a late winner.

Jupp Heynckes Could Learn From Ralph Wiggum About Nose Bleeds

There’s a little Ralph Wiggum in all of us. From the doofus who plays soccer with basketball shoes on to one of the best coaches in Europe, we can all relate to the rotund dimwit from The Simpsons from time to time. Jupp Heynckes should listen to the sage advice from one Ralph Wiggum: “My doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of there.”