Fails

West Brom’s Brilliant Team Building: Eating At McDonald’s And Stealing Taxis

West Brom is in a lot of trouble. The club is bottom of the Premier League, seven points from safety. But Alan Pardew and his boys are turning things around. The great West Brom taxi heist and McDonald’s rendezvous of 2018 is the ultimate team building exercise in football history. I believe it was John Wooden who said: “The team that commits crimes together, stays up together.”

Martín Cáceres Is The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot

Martín Cáceres may want to commit the final lines of the Brand New song “The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot” to memory. The track is now a fitting anthem for the Lazio right back. 

“Call me a safe bet, I’m betting I’m not. 

I’m glad that you can forgive; I’m only hoping as time goes, you can forget.”

Leverkusen Coach Heiko Herrlich Hit With $14K Fine For Awful Sideline Dive

Bayer Leverkusen manager Heiko Herrlich has been hit with a fine approaching $14,500 after taking a comedy tumble during his side’s DFB-Pokal match against Borussia Monchengladbach on December 20. Bayer would win the game 1-0, but Herrlich apologized after the match for his hysterics following Denis Zakaria’s near-impingement on his personal space.

“That was stupid,” said Herrlich. “I’d like to apologize.”

U.S. Soccer Incompetence Hits Staggering Heights As Jonathan Gonzalez Chooses Mexico

As first reported by Univision and subsequently confirmed by ESPN FC and the Washington Post’s Steven Goff, 18-year-old Monterrey midfielder Jonathan Gonzalez, having represented the United States at the U-17, U-18 and U-20 levels, will request a one-time switch of allegiance from FI

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