NY Red Bulls Troll Frank Lampard On Retirement, English Media Can’t Handle It

The holier-than-thou footballing mentality of the English came to the fore when Frank Lampard announced his retirement Thursday. Lampard, who was slated by all of England during the 2006 World Cup and booed at Wembley during their disastrous Euro 2008 qualifying campaign, is a living legend, but he didn’t die on Tuesday, he just won’t be playing for NYCFC anymore.

Deadline Day: Barton Rovers FC Have Bought A Rake

Deadline day is crazy! Lots of teams have needs, and this is the last day to fill them. Teams need wingers, defensive midfielders, inverted fullbacks, false 9's, trequartistas, deep-lying playmakers, target strikers and many more types of soccer players.

One team, though, just needs something to get leaves off their field. Barton Rovers FC have filled a major squad need on deadline day by going to the store and buying a rake.

Let This Own Goal Be A Hilarious Lesson To Work On Your Weaker Foot

Darren Bent, former England international and Tottenham Hotspur forward, is a proper forward’s forward. The 32-year-old has scored over 200 goals in his career, and he doesn’t faff about around the net. So when the football made its way to him on his own goal line, he did what Tommy Smyth is apparently talking about when he says put a bulge in the old onion bag. 

He bulged that bag with a left-footed slice that had Lionel Messi beaming from ear to ear. That’s how you use your left, son! Get in! 

Souleymane Doukara Hit A Volley So Hard We Just Don't Know What To Feel Anymore

Leeds United striker Souleymane Doukara will probably win some awards for this goal, and if he does they will be deserved.

We will break down Doukara's goal using the tactical acumen and soccer insights only we here at The18 possess. Here goes: